10 Truths

Do you want it enough to outgrow yourself?

Your brain craves patterns. It feels comfortable in the commonplace and holds a sense of safety when it becomes part of everyday actions. Whether it’s leaving a show on in the background while you handle chores, or noting how your body wakes up around the same time each day to get ready for work, your desire to keep repetition in your life creates a sense of calm. While there might be some ways that perceived repetition can make a positive impact on our lives, they can also hold us back, eventually leading to a misperception of our own goals. That’s where the following ten truths come in…

1. TRUTH #1: Growth is hidden behind what you’ve been avoiding

   The more you hide behind excuses and avoid taking positive action, regardless of the reason, the more you hinder your growth. If you’re at that point, consider whether you’re intentionally not trying to grow.

   Question: What have you been avoiding and why are you avoiding it?

2. TRUTH #2: Influence and trust grow through non-transactional moments

   If you want to build rapport with a client, team member, or loved one, you do it not just in words, but in the genuine notes, the quality work, the detailed reminders, or the acts of kindness. Business and life both require humanity to deepen bonds of security.

   Question: How are you giving that extra bit of non-transactional care both professionally and personally to people?

3. TRUTH #3: Emotional responses become part of your current and future resume

   People remember how you react. If everything is labeled as a cause for panic, you will quickly lose credibility. If nothing is ever important, you will soon lose camaraderie. Examine your emotional responses to situations to develop a deeper understanding of yourself while helping others grow their faith in you.

   Question: What emotional patterns do others perceive from the way you’ve reacted to situations?

4. TRUTH #4: Ownership is a rare, but critical, skill

   When we hold ourselves accountable to the work we do, the situations we’re in, and the results we are part of, we find ways to improve. Ownership isn’t about pointing a finger; it’s about removing bias and looking within. Think through the times you’ve pointed a finger at someone for the results you’ve witnessed. Consider the idea that you had some level of responsibility for that result.

   Question: What are you part of that you keep blaming others for, and what solutions can you bring?

5. TRUTH #5: Most problems are pattern problems, not people problems

   Our brains tend to think we need to create a “bad guy” for any problem we come across. It’s usually us blaming a bad driver, a slow coworker, or a mean acquaintance. What if the problem is just a repeated pattern you haven’t learned to break yet? If you’re always worried about fixing a “person” without addressing the underlying pattern, you’ll keep seeing the actual problem repeat.

   Question: What does a frustrating repeated pattern of yours say about you?

6. TRUTH #6: Curiosity is your ally

   The more we want to know about something, the more we learn. That part is prominent. There’s a deeper reality to that, though. The more you feed your curiosity, the more it excites your passion to learn and act. Curiosity doesn’t just give you a desire to learn; it strengthens your ability to think, which in turn grows your need to do. Always keep exploring.

   Question: Why do you hold yourself back from exploring topics that will help you grow?

7. TRUTH #7: Confidence without knowledge dies under pressure

   Confidence stems from knowledge. The more you know about something, the more you can speak on it. Without knowledge, confidence is just a façade designed to trick yourself more than those around you. If you want to feel more confident, give yourself the space to learn.

   Question: What can you explore more so that when you speak on it, you do it more confidently?

8. TRUTH #8: Feedback is a mirror, not a verdict

   Feedback doesn’t define who you are; it shows you how your actions fit into the system you use. Ignoring feedback blinds you to success, whereas embracing it enables you to rise through opportunities. People often focus all their energy on defending against the feedback they receive, rather than using it to sharpen their skills.

   Question: What feedback have I ignored because it felt uncomfortable?

9. TRUTH #9: Your daily calendar shows what you truly value

   Whether you’re at work or in your personal life, the way you spend your time shows what is most important to you. If you “waste” time with meaningless actions, you show that you’re not engaged in building value for yourself or others. If you find ways to make time for personal recovery, friends, family, growth, and overall improvement, you show that you value yourself and those around you. Just because you say you value something doesn’t mean you show it.

   Question: What have I not given time to that I should?

10. TRUTH #10: Outcomes are more important than goals

    We view goals as “pass or fail,” holding on to the notion that failure means not achieving a goal. That off-putting mentality pushes you far away from what you really want and eventually makes your internal flame of passion fade. Looking at things as outcomes helps you see that every experience, pleasant or not, is a step in the right direction, because it gives you information. Goals have a time and a place, but usually, people focus on them as opposed to talking about the outcomes they’re aiming to achieve.

    Question: Am I more focused on the goals I declare or the outcomes I consistently produce?

Growth doesn’t come from repeated behaviors. We convince ourselves that predictability is a sign of stability, but the focus should be on mastery. To get to it, you have to step out of the autopilot and into a space of awareness. Mastery goes beyond knowledge and into processing behaviors and outcomes. The ten truths above lead you to one undeniable conclusion: Your future will not be determined by what you know or do, but by how deeply you are willing to evolve.

The real question is: Do you want it enough to outgrow yourself?

1. Lean into fears you avoid
2. Have your actions match your words
3. Be objective
4. Take ownership
5. Examine your processes
6. Be curious
7. Gain Knowledge
8. Reflect
9. Don’t waste time on what doesn’t help you evolve
10. Focus on outcomes
11. Follow these ten rules and you will thrive